i hate spotify ads because i listen to playlists in the shower a lot and there is nothing more startling than being completely naked and suddenly hearing lebron james say “i’ll tell you what makes me thirsty”
The United States Postal Service
how come you never see Troy and Gabrielle fucking acting in the first High School Musical. they’re auditioning for a play. a play with words. words need spoken. stage directions need be taken. what even is the plot of that musical. did anyone go to see it. how come Sharpay and her gay brother didn’t get supporting roles actually wait fuck were there any supporting roles? what is the high school musical in high school musical. why does ryan keep wearing hats.
at a pool party
"hey bukowski no offense but why dont you take your shirt off in the pool"
"why do we run from the rain but soak in tubs full of water"
"aight take it easy man"
everyone who likes coconut water is lying